Charles E. Burchfield in his own words Share Tweet

 

Charles E. Burchfield, Journals, Vol. 45, Dec. 8, 1942

Saturday, December 8, 2012

At ten, the two youngest came in, all aglow over a decisive victory; and at midnight, the two eldest came, likewise aglow over a superb concert. So that it was a happy gathering, Mary Alice said she envied Mart going to school tomorrow where she could, without inhibitions, discuss the concert, while she (M.A.) would have to go to the store, where she would not even dare mention going to a concert. I could feel sympathy for her, because it recalled my own position at the Mullins Co. Office where I worked for many years.

I never dared mention any interest in anything, even remotely related to cultural things —music, good literature, or (and least of all) my painting. I think these years of repression, during my earlier career, fastened upon me a habit of reticence that clings to me now, even when I am with completely sympathetic people. It is resented by many people, as indicating indifference or lack of trust on my part. Knowing this, I sometimes seek to break out of this encompassing barrier, with the result that I become over-garrulous, and reveal too much, with the added result that I withdraw even further within, for self-reservation.

Charles E. Burchfield, Journals, Vol. 45, Dec. 8, 1942

 

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